Time to talk
The NSPCC’s Talk PANTS campaign encourages children to recognise and talk about abuse. One survivor tells her story
‘Had something like the NSPCC’s Talk PANTS campaign been available in school when I was young, I think it would have helped me realise what was happening wasn’t right and that I needed to tell somebody who’d believe me,’ says Donna-Marie Wright who was sexually and emotionally abused between the ages of seven and 18 by her stepfather.
Now 46, Donna-Marie supports the NSPCC and its Talk PANTS campaign, which helps young children understand what abuse is and who they can speak to if they are worried or upset about something.
‘When I was six or seven, I remember my stepfather touching me in the bath. It didn’t feel right, and it escalated from there,’ said Donna-Marie.
‘It would be whenever my mum was out of the room. Whenever she went out, I would cry and beg and plead with her to take me with her.
‘He would tell me he loved me and, when I was younger, would say that it was our secret. I was not to tell anybody. As I got older, the abuse continued. When I was 13, he said “If you tell anybody I will kill you, the whole family and myself.” At that age, you just believe that is what’s going to happen.’
The abuse escalated. At the time, Donna-Marie told a schoolfriend who was a witness for her when her abuser went to trial. Donna-Marie endured the trial while pregnant with her son, and saw her stepfather jailed for eight years.
The mother-of-seven said: ‘That’s not even a year for every year I suffered. Not only that - it doesn’t stop, because you carry your mental scars that you have to live with for the rest of your life.
‘I finally found the courage to speak out when I was 18. The police were amazing, I was allocated a child protection officer. They were supportive throughout and never once was I made to feel like it was my fault. Contrary to what my stepfather would tell me.
Donna-Marie is a huge advocate for the NSPCC’s PANTS campaign, which uses age-appropriate language, the fun Pantosaurus mascot and a catchy song to help children aged three to 11 recognise abuse and know how to seek help.
She said: ‘As soon as they are old enough to understand, it is a conversation all parents should have with their children.
‘I think Talk PANTS is a brilliant concept. I used it to talk to my children to help keep them safe from sexual abuse, especially the younger ones because they don’t really understand. It’s a fun way to engage the kids, with Pantosaurus and the song.’
Now, Donna-Marie has welcomed two grandchildren and is living happily with her family in Oxfordshire. She wants readers to know that she is not defined by her experiences and hopes sharing her story will encourage others to find out more about Talk PANTS and help prevent abuse.
‘It’s taken me a long time to get here but I am in a good place. I still do have my moments. Times when I get quite anxious, when I won’t let anyone touch me, and need my personal space,’ she said.
‘To children who may be facing similar things, I would tell them that they have done nothing wrong. If anything happens to them, anything they don’t feel comfortable with or a moment when they just felt something wasn’t quite right, they should speak to someone they trust.
For more information, search Talk PANTS and NSPCC.
Valuable partnerships support charity’s vital work
The NSPCC relies on donations for more than 80 per cent of the funding it needs to help protect children from abuse. Public fundraising events like this summer’s Childhood Day are great ways of raising both money and awareness for the charity.
The special relationships that the NSPCC creates with companies across the UK to generate income or volunteers are also important. For example, the NSPCC has recently formed a partnership with luxury holiday firm Riviera Travel. As part of its Affinity Partnership scheme, the firm will donate 10 per cent of cruisegoers holiday costs to the NSPCC, equating to hundreds of pounds per trip at no extra cost to the customer. All customers need to do is to mention the NSPCC while booking their holiday or book through a dedicated link, and they will be supporting the charity’s vital work across the UK.
That work includes sharing safeguarding messages in schools, supporting children and families who have experienced abuse and running local and national campaigns to help prevent abuse and neglect. It will also support services like the NSPCC helpline for adults concerned about the safety of a child and Childline, which is a free and confidential space for children whenever they need help.
Stuart Milan, Riviera Tavel’s trading director, said: ‘The best part is, the holiday price stays the same and the holidaymakers know they’re doing good and supporting children and families across the UK without having to dig any deeper.’
Another new partnership for 2024 is with the UK’s largest housing association, Clarion Housing Group.
The social landlord is aiming to raise £100,000 for the NSPCC in the first 12 months of the three-year partnership. This money will support the NSPCC’s Building Connections online service, which is run by Childline to help young people find a way through loneliness.
Clare Miller, chief executive of Clarion Housing Group, said: ‘Our collaboration aims to create a safer and brighter future for children and young people through the NSPCC’s innovative Building Connections programme, and I look forward to seeing colleagues come together to fundraise and volunteer over the next three years.’
*Children and young people can contact Childline at any time on 0800 1111 or via childline.org.uk
*Adults with concerns about a child can speak to the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000, email help@nspcc.org.uk or find advice and guidance at nspcc.org.uk
*To support the NSPCC through Riviera Travel’s Affinity Partnership, phone 01283 901275 or visit rivieratravel.co.uk/NSPCC and mention the NSPCC.
In partnership
Newsquest Media Group, publisher of Great British Life, is proud to be supporting the NSPCC across its UK titles throughout 2024 as part of a £6m partnership.
To make a donation visit nspcc.org.uk/donate
